So I have begun the process of collecting data for my Master’s Thesis and I am in the process of getting the early stages of the proposal for the actual paper all squared away. All seems to be going well but it is a little surreal to actually be in the middle of conducting my own research in grad school. Sure I conducted some research in my undergraduate career but this is really different. For the most part, I conducted research in my undergrad as a class requirement or to get Honors in Psychology when I graduated. But in a lot of ways, that research was not my own because I had to give in to a lot of what other people thought I should do or what I was assigned to do. This research I am doing now is my own.
I never thought by the end of my first year I would be in the midst of my first major research project, which is a candidate for getting published eventually and beginning my career as an academic. It really is just a surreal situation. This is what I want to be doing with my life and I am actually doing it now. Earlier this year I started teaching on a semi-regular basis and began getting a taste of that and now I am conducting my own research. It is like I am finally getting to do what I wanted to do in the first place and it really is an exciting feeling.
Obviously there are things that aren’t so great like the amount of time it takes to be doing this stuff, especially when you have assignments for your full load of classes to worry about. But still, getting the opportunity to really do what it is that I want to be doing with myself is just exciting. It makes a lot of the struggles and annoyances in the past kind of worth it because you now can start to see the road to where you are going a little clearer. I guess that is what this year has been like for me. At first, it felt like I had set out into the wilderness without a clue of where I was or what I should be doing. However, slowly but surely, I began to find my way as my path toward my goals became clearer and clearer as I reached certain milestones and achievements along the way. I think getting to do my own research really is one of those major moments of clarity that soothes your nerves and helps you see that things just might be okay after all. It isn’t an easy path to follow but once you start to see it and see where it is leading you, it makes you happy that you put yourself out there in the wild in the first place.
